Trying my best to fight severe clinical depression. Fighting hard to get well and be up to being a full time employee somewhere.
Fighting, fighting, fighting.
I try to be the light for others, and hope some of it might rub off on/in yours truly.
Be the Light.
News not only of over another two dozen dead in a Texas church massacre today, but also an additional shooting outside yet another church in California. It kind of puts a dark cloud over the day.
Sigh.
No matter though. A few Twitter comments will solve ALL of this…(and also comfort, feed, support, nurture, and heal the bodies and minds of all the victims and their families.)
And don’t forget to send those victims and their loved ones all guns. LOTS of guns. And ammo. God bless ammunition.
Forget prayers. We got guns. lots of them. Our God given right in fact.
And be sure and look the other way. Always. THAT will fix it for sure.
Then quickly find some other issue to move the spotlight elsewhere. Point fingers and make random accusations about something. Anything. Just make shit up if need be.
Not sure why I can’t seem to get past my depression.
Must be something I ate. Being fed bullshit on a daily basis might have a wee bit to do with it.
Gotta laugh.
Dad and Momma, I GUARANTEE you’re both in a much better place.
Be the Light.
In the end, each other is all we have.
That, and the Serenity Prayer. I checked. Love Matty
Matthew Lyle Landsman 
Matt I am so sorry for your State , I have fought sever depression it took counseling and some medication to help me see the light again. I worry I will fall into it again and lately it has been more difficult. The news is the worst to watch I have to filter things from outside sources sometimes it does help. Hope to brighter days soon. It can get better
Marsha
Sent from my iPhone
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Matt,
I woke up this morning, struggling on day 3 of brutal jetlag to find your blogpost…
On top of what seems the ever darkening news, it is important to me to respond, my thoughts emerging from my heart, brain and spirit, to yours. Know that the questions asked are those I pose to myself often.
First, ask your body how often ‘trying’ works…
Next…
Ask your heart how often ‘fighting’ leads to peace…
How can you be good for someone else when you are not well?
How can you be light for another when your inner lights are dim or off…
The mandate ‘Be the light’ is a futile command, too often issued by others or our brains, both of which we have too often allowed to control the dimmer switch…
Stop buying existential lies that are false, and truisms that have no relationship to Truth or what is true for you.
Give yourself time for being still, creating opportunities to remember who you are…
Clouds are just that… clouds. Breathe and let your exhale blow them away, revealing the light once more…
Reveal lies with love, remembering that sarcasm is an insult —inner assault— turned inside out…
Matt, remember that the admonition to ‘Pray without ceasing’ doesn’t mean close your eyes, get down on your knees and make your hands into a steeple. ‘Without ceasing’ means to live, opening your eyes, walking in the world and realising that all hands are for healing, for hugging, and for holding. When you hear another making shit up, clean it up by speaking your truth with love.
As for ‘what you ate’… Maybe that needs cleaning up as well. We’ve been fed shit for years, and now that we’re adults its time to take charge of that as well. Watch ‘What the Health’. Please. It reveals the lies and brings new meaning and measure to the Serenity Prayer.
Love from Marbella,
Lynnclaire